Colonia del Sacramento

I have to cross the border every three months to renew my 90-day tourist visa, which is a fine excuse to take a wee trip. The usual getaway for tourists is Colonia del Sacramento, just across the water in Uruguay. I had crowed to JP that I’d been there piles of times already, really believing that I had… Then I had to eat my words on realising I had been just once before, on my very first visa trip back in 2003. All the other times I had motored over the Andes on a bus to Chile, flown to Brazil and further for holidays or chosen Carmelo for a day-trip instead – also on the Uruguayan coast but further up the river.

And so off we headed for the day on the slow morning ferry, ploughing through the grey water and through the grey mist. I was staggered by the energy of a particular group of Argentine couples in their sixties nearby who were up and down in their seats like yo-yos throughout the three-hour journey, constantly nattering and offering each other sweets and biscuits. Hungry and slightly dizzy on arriving, we both scoffed a chivito each. Prepare yourselves for the mighty chivito

Beef, bacon, egg, lettuce, tomato, portobello mushroom, olives etc etc. We then rolled outside to potter around. The sky was overcast and the street we were on very quiet. There are no traffic lights. Cars drive slowly and graciously stop for pedestrians at the right point. How polite.

We wandered up a thin uphill street and discovered the old town, and what a beautiful job the Portuguese did. It’s a UNESCO World Heritage Site. The grey skies couldn’t ruin it for us. It’s very peaceful there, starting with the Basilica del Santísimo Sacramento.

The small blue buggy in the next photo was one of many for hire on leaving the ferry terminal. We saw people scooting around on them and JP longingly mumbled the name printed on the side – mula, ‘mule’ – repeatedly throughout the day. Okay okay, next time we’ll hire one although I’ll be embarrassed to ride in it, being in a quaint Uruguayan coastal city and not cruising across a Californian golf course.

These chipper cyclists weren’t put off by the low and brooding clouds.

We paused for some tea and cake, a very special merenguey, biscuity, chocolatey, dulce de leche creation called sablé, served by a friendly Brazilian waiter. Get your chops around this…

Colonia is even quieter when night falls, like a ghost town. We crept and whispered our way back to the ferry to chug on the fast boat back to the Big Smoke…

This red-cheeked monkey, Joaquín, kept us wide awake on the journey back by scrambling over his seat to question us endlessly and hit JP when he didn’t answer, howling with laughter. Pointing at me he’d giggle and say ‘Juan, Juan, Juan, Juan, who’s that? Is that your girlfriend? It is isn’t it?’ followed by peals of teasing laughter. Having a girlfriend is deeply uncool…